Monthly Archives: August 2009

Searching for a place called home

This month marks the two-year anniversary of our move to North Carolina. We’ve managed to thrive in our relationship and in our finances, but our social life is still at a standstill. We haven’t made many friends, and we really just don’t feel like we fit here. Being home last week only made that clearer to me.

I miss having a place to go for Sunday dinner. I miss getting together with friends for dinner or drinks. I miss having a support network of friends and family close by to help us through the tough times. Being with so many people who love us last week made it clear to me just how hard it’s been for us to get through the last two years alone.

Tony and I are blessed with a wonderful, supportive relationship, and for a long time I thought that we were enough for each other. But the closer we get to starting a family of our own, the more sure I become that we can’t do it alone. We want our kids to know the kind of childhood that we did — surrounded by grandparents, aunts and uncles, and family friends.

I’ve written before about our tentative plans to move back to Indiana when Tony graduates in December 2010. Last week pretty much cemented our plans. Even though it’s been two whole years, I’m more homesick than ever. I can’t imagine going through a pregnancy and my first year with a newborn without my mom, sisters and best friend there to hold my hand.

Every time I come home, my nieces and nephews have grown into entirely new life stages. The tiny infants I left behind two years ago are walking and talking and looking at me suspiciously because they don’t know me. It breaks my heart.

We’ve struggled with this decision since we began planning our lives together three years ago. We’ve dreamed of living as ex-pats in Europe for a few years or trying life in a new part of the country. But the older we get and the closer we get to starting a family, the more I know we need to be closer to ours. I’m craving a place to call home.

Between college and grad school and the time in between the two, we’ve been living in transition for seven years with another year and a half to go. We’re ready to find a home of our own.

What are your “go-to meals” for hectic weeks?

On weeks like this one after we’ve been traveling or the weekend is too busy to run our usual errands, the last thing we want to do is plan meals and grocery shop on Sunday night or Monday morning. Unfortunately, these are the weeks when planning is most important. The refrigerator and pantry are shockingly empty and we’re too tired at night to be creative with dinner.

The mix of exhaustion, laziness, and disorganization is dangerous for your budget and your health. It’s nights like these when I’m most likely to say, “Forget cooking, let’s order a pizza.” But after a week of overspending and overeating on vacation, fast food is the last thing we need.

For weeks like this, I have a list of meals that are quick, relatively healthy, and simple to prepare. We usually try to be creative and come up with at least one new recipe a week. Not this week. We pulled our menu plan directly from our go-to meal list.

Here are some of the meals I add to my menu when I’m crunched for time:

  • Chicken quesadillas
  • Tacos
  • Bean and cheese burritos
  • Pasta with marinara sauce
  • Homemade pizza
  • Canned soup and sandwiches
  • Grilled cheese
  • BLT sandwiches or salad
  • Breakfast for dinner

These may not be the healthiest options in our recipe book, but they’re healthier than fast food and simple enough that we can cook them up with no hassle.

Kacie at Sense to Save has written about experimenting with batch cooking to make hectic weeks even easier on her. Foods like casseroles or soups can be frozen and heated up later.

How do you get through your craziest weeks without ordering in?

Winding down from a wonderful vacation

We’re home after a marathon 10-day trip to Indiana to see family and friends. Ten days, three cities, 2,000 miles, babies, puppies, family … we’re absolutely exhausted.

dogs

Above: Howie and Abby, my sister-in-law’s beagle puppy, take a brief break from their constant wrestling.

As we drove home, I found myself dreading the budget breakdown that always follows a vacation. We had big plans to be as frugal as possible, and we worked really hard at it, but inevitably there is always a little money spent on vacation. We treated friends to dinner to thank them for hosting us. We bought food and drinks on the road. We made a couple of very small impulse purchases at a record store in Indianapolis (about $10 for record albums to play on the used record player my sister’s husband generously gave to us).

blogger eli

Above: My adorable nephew getting an early start blogging.

We budgeted $400 for this trip including gas, food, and entertainment. We’re actually not far off that mark. Gas cost about $200 and we spent about $150 meeting friends for dinner, going out for drinks, and enjoying ourselves. The nice thing about staying with family and friends is that money usually reserved for a hotel can go to more fun.

We’re back now which means back to reality. Back to budgeting, cooking at home, staying in on the weekends, watching what we eat, and waking up early to exercise. No fun, right? But as hard as it is to get back into our routine, I find myself craving that stability. We’ve been living out of our suitcases for 10 days, bouncing from house to house all over Indiana as we visit family and friends, uprooting the dog every 72 hours. We’re all ready for some normalcy.

I’ve written before about how hard it is for me to get back into the swing of things after a vacation. That spendy mentality tends to stick around, especially as we start to come down from the excitement of vacation. We start to feel down and try to console ourselves by bringing back that vacation mentality — overspending and overeating.

But the sooner we get back into our routine, the easier it will be to overcome those feelings. I came back to work yesterday and Tony’s last year of graduate school begins tomorrow. I took yesterday off from the gym, but this morning I was up bright and early. I’ll likely catch up on laundry and tidying tonight.

While the winding down from a vacation can be a downer, I’m reminding myself of how nice it is to be back in the quiet of my own home, spending time alone with my husband, and living the quiet life that we love so much.

Menu Plan: 8/15-8/21

After 14 hours in the car, we returned home last night at 11 p.m. We cleared our refrigerator and pantry before leaving, so there is absolutely no food in the house, not even the most basic staples like milk and bread. Luckily, our 14-hour car ride came in handy. We had plenty of time for menu planning and list making. All that’s left is to head to the grocery store tonight after work to replenish our stock.

We’re absolutely exhausted, and we had no time last weekend to relax or run any of our usual weekend errands, so we want to keep this week’s meal plan as simple and frugal as possible. Here’s what we’re cooking:

Monday: Beef tacos and refried beans
Tuesday: BLT salad
Wednesday: Breakfast for dinner (eggs and bacon)
Thursday: Cauliflower mac & cheese
Friday: Turkey wraps

I’m remembering now why we usually plan a day at the end of our vacations to catch up at home and get some rest. But we had such a great time last weekend that I’m glad we stayed the extra day, even if it means we’ll spend the rest of the week playing catch up.

For more menu plans, check out OrgJunkie. Happy Monday! I’m already looking forward to the weekend!

Traveling with pets without losing your mind

This week on our vacation to Indiana to visit family and friends, we brought our dog Howie along for the ride. Our families were both happy to accommodate him, and he’d rather be with us than back home in a kennel. But bringing a dog along on vacation comes with a long list of hassles.

Howie window

We took some steps to keep Howie happy and out of our hosts’ hair while saving our own sanity. Try these tips if you’re bringing your favorite family pet along for vacation:

Exercise, exercise, exercise.

If you think your dog has had enough exercise, put him on the leash and take him out again. If you have a young dog, it’s not possible to exercise him enough on vacation.

Howie is incredibly well behaved in the car — he usually just goes right to sleep as soon as we start driving. But we still stop every two hours on the road to let him stretch his legs on long car trips. We also took him for a run every morning when we were staying with family. Nothing is more stressful than an under-exercised dog in a strange environment. Without enough exercise, dogs are restless and whiny at best and downright destructive at worst. Make sure they’re spending the vacation as tired as possible.

Bring as much of home as you can.

When Howie was younger and sleeping in a crate, we brought it along on trips. Now we bring his dog bed, his favorite toys, and plenty of food. If you’re traveling with a cat, consider bringing a scratching post, cat toys and bed to keep them occupied and comfortable. Bringing a piece of home along with you will make them feel more secure in a strange environment, and the more secure they feel, the less likely they are to act out.

Don’t pawn your pet off on family.

I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but Howie is pretty much the most adorable dog ever. Consequently, all of our family members were offering to walk him and feed him and pet him. It’s easy to walk away and assume they’ll take care of taking him outside or disciplining him if he’s getting too rowdy. Be careful not to do that.

If you’re visiting family with your pet, don’t expect them to do the dirty work. Just because they’re enjoying the novelty of your furry friend doesn’t mean they want to scoop the litter box or follow your dog around with a poop bag. Don’t get too distracted to take care of your pet’s basic needs.

If your family or friends want to take advantage of the fun parts of spending time with a pet, let them. But when it comes to the dirty work, make sure you’re doing it yourself. If you expect someone else to take out the dog, you might end up with a mess on the floor, and your family won’t be so willing to welcome your pet next time.

Since I’m not a cat owner, I’d like to hear from those of you who’ve traveled with cats. How do you make it easier on your pet when you’re traveling?

Curing the summertime blues

end of summerMost people are likely to feel a little blue during the dark winter months, but I always start to feel down at the end of August. In North Carolina, it’s been unbearably hot and muggy since the end of May, and we’re still facing another 3 months of heat and humidity. I’m homesick for fall and cranky from the heat. I start to feel like I need a pick-me-up.

Here are some surefire tactics for combating the summertime blues:

Take a short trip.

We planned our frugal vacation back home strategically during one of the hottest weeks of the year in North Carolina. Right now, it’s 104 degrees back home. It’s still hot and muggy in Indiana, but we’re dealing with 85-90 degrees instead of an unbearable 100+. We’re also spending time with family, taking a much needed break from work and home life, and relaxing. Since we still have a couple months left of muggy summer weather, this is a nice break in between to recoup and recharge before Tony heads back to school.

Take advantage of the things you love about summer.

For many of you, this may not be a problem. When I talk about being tired of summer, most people think I’m a little crazy. But if you’re like me and you’re craving fall, remind yourself of all the things you do love about summer. For us it’s fresh produce, driving with the window down, and late sunsets.

I remind myself that pretty soon I won’t be able to enjoy fresh produce for cheap or drive to work with the wind in my hair. Pretty soon the sun will set before I even leave work. So I’m trying to enjoy the end summer instead of thinking about how miserable the heat makes me or how much I dread those summer electric bills.

Start a new project.

With the summer winding down, it’s easy to feel sluggish and unmotivated in the heat. The easiest way to pick yourself up again is to immerse yourself in a new project. Find something that excites you, and get started on it now. Last year around this time, I started this blog. Now is the perfect time to clean your house top to bottom and make some money at a late-summer garage sale. This year I’ll probably commit myself to finally finishing one of my quilting projects or purge the junk in my apartment.

What about you? Are you feeling the summertime blues? How do you fight them?

Photo by jimntonik

Simple ways to sleep better naturally

sleep betterI’ve struggled with insomnia my whole life. Anyone who’s ever had sleeping problems knows that without enough sleep, you’re less productive and less happy. Recent studies have even shown that poor sleeping habits can increase your risk of obesity and all the health risks that go along with it.

In the past, I’ve made the mistake of relying on over-the-counter medications to fall asleep. It was never a habit, but every once in a while I’d be desperate for sleep and believe I had no other options. It turns out I was wrong.

Here are the simple ways I improved my sleep (and my health):

Take a serious look at your diet

It’s possible your diet is keeping you awake. Back when my sleeping problems were at their worst, I was drinking 2 or 3 diet sodas a day (to be fair, this was college). I never drank soda in the late evening, but it turned out I was more sensitive to caffeine than I thought. When I stopped drinking caffeinated beverages after noon, sleep came much easier. Examine your diet closely to make sure you’re not sabotaging your sleep.

Are you getting enough exercise?

If not, you may not be tiring yourself out enough. Once I started working out daily, not only did I fall asleep more easily, but I slept more soundly.

Stick to a schedule

We’ve all heard it before, but it’s really true: those luxurious Sunday mornings when you sleep until 9 or 10 can throw off your schedule. If you’re a problem sleeper, try setting a bedtime and wake-up time and sticking to it throughout the week. It may be tough to give up sleeping in, but you’ll feel better rested throughout the week.

Add a calming ritual to your nighttime routine

Whether it’s a bubble bath, stretching, relaxing music, a cup of herbal tea or a book, do something before bed that puts you in the most relaxed state possible. Avoid stressful activities in the last hour before bed, and give yourself some “you” time.

Disconnect before bed

Though I addressed some of the physical reasons I couldn’t sleep, I still struggle with mental roadblocks. While living during the age of constant connection has its perks, all that electronic stimulation can interrupt your sleep cycle.

We’ve all been there. You log on to Facebook to check up on your friends before bed, and five minutes turns into an hour. You start channel surfing and end up staying up way too late. Or a quick call to your best friend turns into an hour chat.

To avoid these distractions, force yourself to tune out at least an hour before you want to sleep. Put away your laptop, turn your cell phone to vibrate, and yes, turn off the TV. I used to think I needed the TV to help me sleep, but a book turned out to be a much less distracting, more relaxing bedtime companion.

What’s your advice for getting a better night’s sleep?

Photo credit: neaners

Tracking spending on a cash budget

budgetingOne of the top complaints I hear about cash budgeting is that it’s harder to track spending with cash. When you’re swiping a debit card, it’s easy for to track spending electronically. When you’re spending cash, there’s a little more work involved.

I use Mint.com to set and track my budget. The idea of changing my system completely, or using the envelope method was exhausting. So I came up with a system for tracking my cash purchases electronically.

I still use Mint.com to track my spending. Mint allows you to split transactions. Before we were cash budgeting, we used the split transaction feature to categorize spending. If we bought dog food at Target along with other household purchases, we’d split the transaction so that the price of dog food was categorized with “Pet Expenses” while the rest of the purchase went under “Household Expenses.” Simple.

That feature makes it just as easy to split cash transactions. On Saturday, we withdraw our weekly cash allowance. We do our grocery shopping, pick up household purchases, and run errands for the week. I save all the receipts for purchases made with that cash.

Mint categorizes our ATM withdrawal as a single transaction. The following Saturday before grocery shopping, I split the ATM transaction based on the receipts I’ve saved.

To do this, just highlight the ATM transaction, click on “Edit Details,” and then “Split.” Enter the store and spending category. That amount will be categorized correctly in your budget. Cash we don’t spend remains categorized as “ATM Transaction.” If we spend it later, I go back to the original ATM transaction and categorize it correctly.

It reminds me a lot of something I watched my mother do every weekend when I was a kid: balancing a checkbook.

Electonic banking and money management software have made checkbook balancing obsolete. It’s possible to track purchases up-to-the-minute online, so most people are happy to be done with the hassle of checkbook balancing. But tracking spending manually makes me more accountable. It a little extra work, but it’s made me a lot more knowledgeable about where my money goes.

This system takes all the guesswork and stress out of budgeting for me. Instead of mentally adding things up in my head and checking my bank balance, I forget about budgeting until Saturday morning. I only take out the cash I can afford to spend, so there’s no danger of overspending. At the end of the week, I organize that week’s spending and start over again.

Have you ever lived on a cash budget? How do you stay organized and track spending?

Photo credit: spiderpop

Headed home to Indiana!

We’re hitting the road today, and we’ll be back home with family by sunset. :)

I have some posts scheduled for next week, and I’ll be checking my email and moderating comments regularly, so you shouldn’t even notice I’m gone. But I will be spending the week relaxing, snuggling my nieces and nephews, and seeing my best friends and family.

I haven’t had a vacation since Christmas, so I’m pumped! Be back next week!