Last month after some encouragement from my favorite blogger friend Kacie at Sense to Save, I joined a book club. We still had 15 months left in North Carolina, and I was homesick and lonely for some girlfriends — or any friends other than my wonderful husband.
Last week I attended my first book club meeting, and I’m so sorry I didn’t do it sooner. We’re moving in just seven months now, but I plan to continue attending book club meetings until we move. It felt so good to get out of the house and do something social without my husband. When I came home, I was so happy to see him, and it felt good to tell him all about it.
I love sharing experiences with my husband. There’s no one else in the world I would rather spend my time with. But going out without him made me realize how much I miss doing my own thing, too. When you’re married, especially when you’re happily married to your best friend, it’s so important to do things every once in a while just for you. It’s healthy to have experiences without him so we can continue to learn and grow as individuals. After all, we fell in love with each other as individuals.
I was nervous about it. I didn’t know if I would fit in. I almost backed out at the last minute, telling myself, “Well, we’re moving in seven months now. There’s no point.” But I’m so glad I went.
Now it’s your turn. If there’s an interest or hobby you’ve been wanting to try, do it! Even it if means stepping outside of your comfort zone. Take a cooking class, join a book club, find a moms group.
I found my book club at Meetup,com, which was great, because I was able to look through the other women’s profiles before joining to make sure it was the right group for me. Most of them were in their 20s and 30s, married, with no kids. Just like me! It made the whole process a lot easier.
The most important thing wasn’t getting together and talking with other women about a book (even though that was fun). This experience taught me that I can do this. I can meet people outside of work and outside of my relationship if I’m willing to put in a little effort and step out of my comfort zone. It’s unlikely that any of the women in my new book club will become my new best friend, but that doesn’t mean I won’t look forward to getting together with them once a month to talk about books and drink a glass of wine.
It felt so good to do something by myself, to meet and talk to people who don’t know me as half of Karen and Tony, but now know me only as Karen. And most importantly, when we move and I find myself in a new place again, it won’t be so scary to step out and make some friends on my own.
What have you always wanted to try on your own?